Flux in the Language

Pronouns: First Person, Singular.
Tense: Preterite.

Is that how it ends? Watch this space.

Have a look at my world through the lens of a camera.
Visit Twisted Indifference at Flickr

No Where To Go

“Deep beneath the cover of another perfect wonder where it’s so white as snow,
Privately divided by a world so undecided and there’s no where to go
In between the cover of another perfect wonder and it’s so white as snow
Running through the field where all my tracks will be concealed and there’s no where to go.”
-Snow (Hey Oh) by Red Hot Chili Peppers

The first time I actually have included the chorus of a song. Generally I just nick a line from the lyrics. There’s a reason however, for me changing my format. First would be that I need the entire chorus to convey what I’m thinking. Second would be that this is the first time I’ve seen RHCP make so much sense in their lyrics. The song rocks, completely.

Left Click here for the disclaimer regarding the use of lines from songs.
Your left not mine. (Sorry Illiad couldn’t resist)

I couldn’t stop listening to the song, nor I could stop wondering about the lyrics. It actually makes so much sense. Skeletons in the closet or delusions, wanting to believe in something or just plain lying to yourself. Take your pick. It’s all there. Unbelievable, there’s another quote coming up. I believe it was George Bernard Shaw who said something about the two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart’s desire and the other is to gain it. True, you’d kill for what you want. At times only to realize that what you wanted was completely something else.

Incidentally if I quote someone again, please shoot me.

Moving on. Heart’s desire. You want something so badly that it hurts. The lack frustrates you to the point where you’re actually pulling your hair out. It can get so bad that you’re actually acting like a hopeless case junkie in rehab. You would go to any lengths to acquire it. Herein lies the wanting to believe and the lying to yourself. Blinded? Possibly. Logic seems to take the biggest hit. Even when you realize that you’re busting your ass trying to gain something that just goes further away the more you try you can’t stop. Why do we always chase something we cannot have? (Arggh! kill me now, that’s from Dangerous Liaisons) The answer’s immaturity by the way.

Now this post is getting hilarious. I don’t remember why I started writing this. I’m quoting other people and there’s hardly any originality left in this. Guess I can attribute it to my current frame of mind. Confused! My mind keeps fluctuating between emotions that are complete antitheses of each other. My take on reality at the moment is all convoluted. I think I need to write something once my mind clears up and I’m thinking straight again. Do I hear a resounding ‘HAH!’?

Have a look at my world through the lens of a camera.
Visit Twisted Indifference at Flickr

If you wanna run cool...

If you wanna run cool...
Originally uploaded by Twisted Indifference.

You've got to run, on Heavy Heavy Fuel!!
Maybe I should consider adding bottles of beer here? Complete the setup. Obviously I would have to change the location, I don't think bringing beer to office would be appreciated.

Have a look at my world through the lens of a camera.
Visit Twisted Indifference at Flickr

There's Love If You Want It

Hurts don't it? Two years of building your dream only to see it collapse into rubble. There's nothing you can do about it. Just watch it. Watch it fall apart, every brick a memory, a promise made. Your head spins at the speed at which reality dawns on you. An empty space where your castle in the sky once stood. A void in your heart where you cherished every moment. The moment's gone, the music's over, the bar's closed. Head home! Only you can't.

You don't want to. Or is just that you're too scared to step out? The pentagram's not going to protect you anymore. The sanctity's been breached. And again, YET freakin' again you didn't see it coming. The light at the end of the tunnel was the express train moron! It was not your delusion of salvation. Yea right! Love made your world go round? Brace yourself, this was just the beginning. You're not just alone, you're also on your knees. You've been brought there. You're caught in a sandstorm, every grain of sand, a dream that cannot be dreamt no more. Creating gashes in your skin, feeling it ripped apart and just begging for the pain to stop.

Spit the blood out, move it. You stop and look back, bad move. You know you can't let go. Can't let go of that hand which pulled you out of every damn crisis. Held you close every time the chips were down. Vanished any traces of previous scars. And it's this hand that put you here. Mistakes happen? I doubt it in this case. Why can't you just let go?

The tears subside, you have a little clarity. Survival instinct someone mentioned. You're making your way back home. The message you left was clear, yea there's love if you want it...

My Apologies Your Furriness!

You woke me up for that?
Originally uploaded by Twisted Indifference.

That's Edison, and I'm his human. Note that he's asleep on what used to be my bed and waking him up from his slumber is not well received.

Have a look at my world through the lens of a camera.
Visit Twisted Indifference at Flickr